“Seek good, not evil, that you may live.”  – Amos 5:14 

During a recent routine checkup my long-time physician after glancing at my chart looked up and jokingly remarked that I had reached the exact age of average life expectancy for men in America.  (Oh, gee, thanks Doc, just what I wanted to be reminded of!)  I suppose that means in just a few short months, on my next birthday – assuming I make it – I will have beaten the odds.  (Whoopee!)  Simultaneously, I find myself wrestling with my emotions over the fact that our two oldest granddaughters who are entering their senior years of high school, will in just a few short months, this coming spring, be graduating, that great right-of-passage into adulthood.

Seems we are sort of bookends on the timeline of life, my granddaughters and me.  And if that sounds a bit melancholy on my part nothing could be further from the truth.  Yes, I miss that they will not be little girls anymore, but they’ve long outgrown that anyway.  Neither is aging of particular concern to me as I have found this in many ways to be the most fulfilling season of life so far.  Yes, in my case some of that can be attributed to good fortune – reasonably good health, financial comfort, a long happy marriage, and the fine family we have blessed with, including our five beautiful granddaughters.  But true fulfillment has little to do with good fortune, I have learned, otherwise why do so many who have attained good fortune, much greater than mine, seem unfulfilled, while others who have suffered misfortunes of all sorts seem extraordinarily fulfilled?

It is the secret to life, it seems to me, that God is trying to get across to us throughout the scriptures.  “Seek good, not evil,” wrote the prophet Amos, “that you may live.”  I don’t think the Prophet was warning about Santa Claus coming to town, that if we are good little girls and boys we get presents, but if we are bad we are apt to get zapped.  I think what he really means is by seeking out the good we will discover a truly fulfilling life, something Jesus was crystal clear about when He said, “I have come that they may have life, and have it to the full.”  And I don’t think he meant life filled with good fortune as we think of it from a worldly perspective, rather a life filled with an indescribable joy.

If I can somehow convey that one lesson to my grandchildren as I live out my days, then my life will have been lived to the “full”, that one day – someday – so may theirs be.

“Therefore . . . let us be thankful.”  — Hebrews 12:28 

“Happy people don’t always have the best of everything.  But they know how to make the best of what they have.”  I read that quote in an article this past week and immediately thought of my maternal grandmother, Mema.  Mema always looked elegant – always – whether she was puttering around doing housework, entertaining guests in her small modest living room, or going to church or some other dressy affair.  She had a natural beauty about her anyway, but she always appeared dressed up, even though her entire wardrobe consisted of no more than three simple dresses.  That was it!  You would never know it, though, because she managed to use her creativity to adorn her modest wardrobe in so many different ways, with colorful scarves and simple pieces of inexpensive costume jewelry, that one would think she owned a massive closet full of clothes.

Her wardrobe is just one example of the way she went about everything in her life, never concerning herself with what she didn’t have, rather always focused on making the best of what she did have.  In fact, I don’t remember hearing my grandmother ever complain, “I wish I had [this or that]”.  What I do remember is her gratitude for what she did have, the gas space heater that warmed her cozy living room in the winter, or the swamp-cooler that cooled it during the summer heat, the tiny simple kitchen where she was constantly cooking and baking, mostly for others, or how blessed she was for the people who gave her rides to the grocery store or church on Sunday since she didn’t own a car.

I always loved visiting my grandmother, for I knew as I approached the front door of her small, modest wood-framed house that I was about to enter a happy, cheerful sort of wonderland, and to be embraced by a happy, cheerful person.  Well known and admired in her small community she influenced more people than you can ever imagine.

More than anyone I have ever known my grandmother knew the secret to living an abundant life.  (If only I had paid closer attention and followed in her footsteps at an earlier age!)  Surprisingly, it was not because she knew how to make the best of what she had.  Instead, she made the best of what she had because she was first and foremost thankful – thankful to God – for what she had, and that made all the difference.  “Therefore, let us be thankful” that our lives too may be abundant like hers.

“Let us consider how we may spur one another on toward love and good deeds.”

• Hebrews 10:24

I got to know Al Goldstein while working a parttime job when I was in college.  Al was an imposingly large man with a pot belly and his front teeth missing, who was struggling to support a wife and six kids.  Other than serving in the Navy, he never finished high school, and was a chain-smoking alcoholic with a criminal record.  To earn extra money, on weekends he worked as a bartender and bouncer in some dive in a seedy part of town where fights often broke out, which probably explains what happened to his front teeth.  To me he was the most vulgar human being I had ever met.  Yet, for some reason I liked him anyway.  Something about him fascinated me, perhaps it was my curiosity about the dark underworld he lived in that I had never been exposed to before, or maybe I sensed a good heart buried somewhere deep within his soul.

Eventually, I got called up for active-duty training in the army for the National Guard unit I had joined, so I had to leave. When I returned a few months later they were kind enough to give me my old job back while I completed my undergraduate degree.  To my great surprise, when I walked back in that first day I almost didn’t recognize Al.  His beer belly had trimmed down, and he was clear-eyed after giving up smoking and drinking, had found more honorable ways to supplement his income than that sleezy beer joint, and to my great surprise, he had this glowing smile showcasing a brand new set of front teeth.

During the months I was away Al had changed from being one of the most vulgar human beings I had ever known to just the opposite, and he was not shy about sharing his transformation.  His wife, after patiently coxing him for many years, got him to attend church with her where he was exposed to good people doing good things, who cared for each other and for others, whose mission was to help others and make the world a better place, in sharp contrast to that dark underworld where he had lived most of his life.

Faith communities, service organizations, philanthropists, volunteers, good people doing good things, there are lots of them around.  Want to change the world for the better?  “Let us consider how we may spur one another on toward love and good deeds.”  If it can happen to Al it can happen to anyone.  Just look what his wife did by spurring him on.

“Everyone should be quick to listen, slow to speak and slow to become angry.”

• James 1:19 

Upon his arrival home from work one day a father discovered the front window of his home shattered to smithereens, and there in the yard lay the evidence, a baseball bat and ball.  So, without further investigation the father stormed into the house, found his young son, and was just about to administer the punishment he obviously deserved for what appeared to be an open and shut case . . . until his wife walked in with the boy next door in tow who had confessed to the whole matter.

For many years during my previous career I served as an arbitrator in our industry when disputes arose between two parties.  The way the arbitration system works, arbitrators receive in advance a written detailed explanation of the claim from the claimant (plaintive) as well as a detailed response from the respondent (defendant).  After reading the claim and response I would invariably conclude that it was an open and shut case in need of no further investigation . . . that is, until I listened to the verbal testimonies on the actual day of the hearing.  In most cases my initial conclusion would either be proven wrong, or I would learn something about the evidence that otherwise was not obvious.

Interesting how one of the oldest stories in literature is about what seemed to be an open and shut case, at least that’s what Eliphaz, Bildad and Zophar had thought about their friend Job from the Biblical story bearing his name.  Why else would Job have lost everything he had – his family, wealth and health – unless he was being punished by God for some undisclosed sin he had committed?  All the evidence they needed was in plain sight they thought, Job sitting on an ash heap, clothes ripped to shreds, head shaved, his body covered with painful sores.  No need for further investigation, as Job’s three “friends” accusingly rushed to his side in their respective attempts to convince him to confess – to something he did not do.  And if things were not bad enough for poor Job, he was forced to defend himself in kangaroo court where Eliphaz, Bildad, and Zophar presided as the self-appointed – not to mention self-righteous – judges.

“Everyone should be quick to listen, slow to speak and slow to become angry.”  What a difference it makes if we will simply keep our mouths shut and listen – to both sides.

“. . . seek first his kingdom and his righteousness, and all these things will be given to you as well.”  Matthew 6:33 

We once had this rising star in our company, Will I will call him, who everyone had their eye on as someone who was going places.  Will was young, smart, and handsome with a magnetic personality, and the promotions were coming faster than they could print new business cards for him, moving his young family from one city to the next before they had time to unpack their boxes.  Being a bit older and more stable in my position at that point, I was aware of the hazards that come with such rapid rise of a young ambitious and capable person like Will.

Sure enough, my greatest fears for Will began to unfold one evening in a Las Vegas casino.  There was a company conference we were attending, and one evening as inevitably happens in Vegas a group migrated to a nearby casino.  Will stepped up to one of the game tables, and with his colleagues cheering him on, began placing bets that were way beyond his means, showing off to put it bluntly.  Although there was not much I could do to stop him, I do recall standing off in the shadows wanting to scream, “No Will, don’t do it!”  It paid off for him, though you might say, because soon after Will was offered still another promotion.  But then the wheels started to come off in his personal life as he became separated from his wife and children and eventually divorced.

Will’s downfall in his personal life can neither be blamed on his rapid rise in the ranks nor his long work hours or dedication to his job and company.  He simply got his priorities mixed up, something any of us can be vulnerable to.  Except by the grace of God, in fact, it could easily have been me.  That old joke we have all heard, “no one ever confessed on his deathbed that he wished he had spent more time at the office,” is really no joke at all but a wise proverb; or as Jesus tells it to us straight up, “seek first [God’s] kingdom and his righteousness, and all these things will be given to you as well.”  In other words, first get your priorities straight, number one being seeking God’s kingdom.

It has been many years since I last had contact with Will, but I pray he is doing well and has gotten his priorities straight.  He was such a smart, capable guy with tremendous potential.