“I will also ask you one question.”  – Matthew 21:24 

Most of the classes I took in college are a mere blur at this point, partly because it was so long ago, but more likely that I was not really paying attention anyway.  Except, there was this one unforgettable moment, a rather odd and obscure experience that turned out to be one of the greatest teaching moments of my entire college career.  In freshman chemistry lab we were doing qualitative analysis where we were given a small sample of substance from which we were to run tests to determine its identity.  When my substance turned a reddish shade in the test tube I asked the lab instructor if that was a positive test for ferrous (iron).  But instead of a simple yes or no answer he turned it around on me.  “I don’t know,” he shrugged, “what do you think it is?”

I can’t say I learned much about chemistry that day, a subject I ceased pursuing after my freshman year, but it certainly enlightened me about the purpose of university education, as well as about life, that being that the pathway to deeper understanding is stimulated as much or more by provocative questioning as the accumulation of knowledge.  It is for that exact reason that for those of us in the profession of executive coaching the most effective tool we have in our toolbox is the use of powerful questions to stimulate deeper thought.  It is not at all unusual, for example, for a client who is struggling to resolve a complex issue to ask the coach what the solution is, in which case I often turn it around just like that lab instructor did.  “I don’t know,” I’ll reply, “what do you think it is?”  I recall one client complaining with a wrinkled brow, “But you’re making me think, and thinking is hard work!”  And he was right, thinking is hard work, for the same reason college is harder than high school, and even more so the real world.

There has never been a greater master at asking and handling questions than the Master himself.  Scripture tells of a time when Jesus was teaching in the temple courts and a group of chief priests and elders approached him with a question.  “By what authority are you doing these things?” they asked.  And how did He respond?  Just like that clever lab instructor I once had.  “I will also ask you one question,” he replied.  And it was a question that, to their surprise, did not have an easy answer, forcing them to think.  Like that substance I was testing in the lab, yes it turned red in the test tube indicating ferrous, but was it the right shade of red?  I had to think, you see, and thinking is hard work!

“For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the Lord, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.” – Jeremiah 29:11 

I recall walking through our neighborhood several year ago when we encountered a man leaning against a shovel in his front yard.  He appeared exhausted.  As we passed by he stopped us to solicit our advice.  Seems he was planting rose bushes in a large flower bed, several of them perfectly spaced out – until while digging a hole he encountered a huge immovable rock.  That’s why he stopped us, to see if we had any ideas about what to do with this rock that was getting in the way of his perfectly laid out plan.

How many times has that happened to you, you come up with what you think is a perfect plan only to unexpectedly encounter some huge immovable object?  That’s when you begin to understand the old joke that if you want to make God laugh make plans.

Does that mean we should not make plans?  Absolutely not!  The great General and former President Dwight D. Eisenhower once said, “Plans are nothing; planning is everything.”  In other words, plans hardly ever work out exactly according to plan.  There’s always some unexpected immovable rock we will encounter.  But planning is critical so that we know where we are headed and what we are trying to accomplish.

Every recent college graduate, indeed anyone seeking or starting a new career should read Daniel Pink’s little book, The Adventures of Johnny Bunko; for according to the subtitle it is, The Last Career Guide You’ll Ever Need.  Cleverly presented in comic-book style this little story teaches six essential principles necessary for anyone seeking fulfillment in life and work, number one being (1) “there is no plan”, at least not in the traditional ways we try to lay out plans.  But Johnny Bunko learns from the other principles that (2) we are each given strengths we should focus on rather than weaknesses; (3) life is not about us, but what we do for others; (4) persistence trumps talent; (5) make excellent mistakes; (6) and leave an imprint.  Add them all up together and what is not a plan actually becomes THE plan, that by living by these principles we will find true fulfillment in our life and work.  “’For I know the plans I have for you,’ declares the Lord,” which happens to be His plan too. . .  And by the way, I don’t know what our neighbor did about that rock, but he eventually created a beautiful rose garden.

“Her children arise and call her blessed.”  – Proverbs 31:28 

Browsing through the wide assortment of Hallmark Mothers’ Day cards the other day it suddenly occurred to me the long succession of mothers who have been in my life, most notably my own beloved mother, Elizabeth, the one who gave me life, nurtured, taught, comforted, challenged, and encouraged me well into adulthood.  A role model of grace, a gracious hostess to the constant stream of guests – family, friends, and neighbors – who entered our home; a lover of games and competition, yet gracious in both victory and defeat; and most importantly to me, the one to whom I could confess almost anything without fear of being judged, always receiving grace.  That was my Mom!

But as the Hallmark selection reminded me, I have been blessed with a long succession of mothers, some not related by blood, like Odell, my best friend’s mother who was one of the kindest, wisest, most compassionate, and noblest people I have ever known and continues to influence my life.  And Millie, childless herself yet mother to many, at whose feet I continued to sit until she was well into her nineties, listening to her stories and absorbing her wisdom.  Then there was my dear mother-in-law Patsy who from the time we first met treated me like her own son, believing in me and encouraging me at times when I was unable to believe in myself.  These three, my other mothers!

My two grandmothers come to mind, of course, who I loved and admired deeply, and by whom I was influenced in so many ways, especially their strong values, compassion toward others, and their deep faith.  Yet, beyond my own relationship with them, it was not lost on me their quiet steadfast influence on their own children – my parents, aunts, and uncles – who never ceased gravitating back to them for wisdom, strength, and comfort.  They were the glue that held the family together – my beloved grandmothers!

Finally, I thank God for the mothers of my own offspring, Tee, the mother of our children, and Sharra and Haley, our daughters-in-law and mothers of our five beautiful grandchildren, all models of motherhood in every way.  What a blessing to have been exposed to such a succession of amazing mothers.  May it be for the generations of mothers past, present, and yet to come that “her children arise and call her blessed.”  Thanking God for the mothers in my life!

“See how the farmer waits for the land to yield its valuable crop and how patient he is for the autumn and spring rains.”  – James 5:7 

Having grown up in a small farming and ranching community I am no stranger to the plight of those engaged in agriculture, even though it was not what my family depended on, at least not directly, to put food on the table.  But you can’t live in a place where agriculture is the primary industry without learning about how it works, what it takes to be committed to it, and the mindsets of those who have chosen that as their profession.  Tee and I even dabbled in it ourselves for a few years raising cattle on a small place we had purchased.  Except, unlike the farmers I knew growing up, we did not work at it full time, nor were we dependent on it for financial support.

Our fast-paced, urbanized culture today seems to have developed a creed of impatience over the past century or so, demanding that we make-it-happen-and-make-it-happen-now. The farmer, on the other hand, must wait patiently for his crops to grow, a process that cannot be hurried.  Yet the farmer’s workload is no less demanding than the make-it-happen-now crowd.  He can’t, for instance, just take the summer off and hope all goes well in the field, as there is constantly work to be done to ensure a good harvest.

That said, there are two distinct differences I have observed having spent time in both worlds over the course of my life.  One is certainty versus uncertainty.  The make-it-happen-now crowd, in its desire for instant gratification, seems always on a mission to eliminate uncertainties to ensure regular paychecks are guaranteed.  Farmers, on the other hand, face year-round uncertainties, from drought, to disease, to commodity prices.  Yet – and this is my second observation – the farmers I have known never seemed stressed out like the hard-charging types who dominate the majority of our population today.  Why do you think that is?

As one who long ago drifted from my rural roots into that make-it-happen-now crowd, and lived there most of my life, I have asked myself that question many times.  What I have concluded is that the farmer knows something that much of our society has forgotten, that patience, together with faith in God, produces bumper crops – for certain!

“Each of you should look not only to your own interests, but also to the interests of others.”  – Philippians 2:4 

“Don’t aim at success.  The more you aim at it and make it a target, the more you are going to miss it,” Dr. Viktor Frankl, the famous psychiatrist and author of Man’s Search for Meaning once lectured a group of students.  “For success, like happiness,” he went on, “cannot be pursued; it must ensue, and it only does so as the unintended side effect of one’s personal dedication to a cause greater than oneself or as the by-product of one’s surrender to a person other than oneself.  Happiness must happen, and the same holds for success: you have to let it happen by not caring about it.  I want you to listen to what your conscience commands you to do and go on to carry it out to the best of your knowledge.  Then you will live to see that in the long-run – in the long-run, I say! – success will follow you precisely because you had forgotten to think about it.”

In the coming weeks our two oldest grandchildren will be graduating from high school, that great right of passage moment nearing the responsibilities of adulthood, higher education marking the next step.  As their grandfather, it has been on my mind a lot lately what wisdom I might impart that would be helpful in their life journey.  What keeps popping up in my head is Dr. Frankl’s great quote about not aiming for success, perhaps because I was a such a Johnny-come-lately for that message to resonate with me; for when I was their age I was convinced that the purpose of life was to achieve success.  Oh, how I wish I had been exposed to Dr. Frankl’s brilliant lecture – or perhaps I was but too proud and self-centered to listen.

To be clear, the pursuit of success is not to be confused with the pursuit of excellence, rather it is a matter of to what end.  The Apostle Paul expressed it this way: “Do nothing out of selfish ambition or vain conceit, but in humility consider others better than yourselves.  Each of you should look not only to your own interests, but also to the interests of others.”  The only proof I have to share comes from my own experience, that is that those times when I have pursued self-serving success the results have been sketchy at best.  But when my pursuits have been dedicated to someone else or a greater cause I have been surprised how success – in some form, and when I was least thinking about it – eventually followed.  Here’s to my grandchildren, and their generation!